Called

The Bible talks a lot about calling. We call on the name of the Lord. Jesus called his disciples to follow him. It is a topic that has been sitting on the back burner of my mind recently, and I haven't done as much study into it as I should, but the word keeps coming back to me.

A few verses from the book of Isaiah come to mind with this topic. They came up in the context of an email conversation with a friend who was struggling. I felt like these verses just jumped out of the page at me when I read them, and I almost instantly pulled up my email to share them with said friend (what amazing things God does through his Word sometimes, right?)

Here they are, from Isaiah 42:5-7:

This is what God the LORD says - 

the creator of the heavens, who stretches them out,

who spreads out the earth with all that springs from it,

who gives breath to its people,

and life to those who walk in it:

"I, the LORD, have called you in righteousness;

I will take hold of your hand. 

I will keep you and will make you

to be a covenant for the people

and a light for the Gentiles,

to open eyes that are blind,

to free captives from prison

and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness."

That opening verse catches me in its beauty; the LORD as creator in all his power. It's like a super-condensed version of the end of the book of Job - just overwhelming me with helplessness in the face of the Almighty. He 'spreads out the earth' and 'gives breath...and life' - not a single one of us can do any of those things. 

But the real eye-popping part (to me) is the next two verses. God himself, the LORD, says that he calls us in righteousness. He helps us and holds us and makes us into light, which does some absolutely incredible things. 

The power in these verses, when I read them, comes in the knowledge that God has called all of us to do the same things, but at the same time he has called me to do these things in ways that he has not called other people to do them. God calls all of us to be a light in the places where we are. God calls all of us to be a covenant for the people, to spread the gospel, and to set people free from the darkness that holds them. But just how we do that is unique to us.

God has called me to Thailand. He has called some of my friends to other countries all over the world, such as the US, Guatemala, Zambia, and China (to name a few). In each of these places, there are different kinds of work for the people he calls. Some are preachers. Some are church planters. Some are homemakers or teachers or various forms of community leaders. But each of these jobs is equally as important as the others. They all matter.

I've reflected on my calling a lot in the last year, especially after it was made especially clear to Michael and I that we ought to return to Thailand at the end of last summer. In July and August, I found myself often wondering why I was returning. What was it that God had in store? 

I still am not certain of the answer to that question, but in the last few months I have reflected a lot on several things related to my calling to be where I am:

• 9 years ago, I had no desire to work with teenagers, and especially not high school students. Nope. Definitely not. Never. And yet...here I am, 9 years later, finding myself starting an extracurricular activity at our school for the high school students that I love so dearly. I'm spending extra time with them not because I have to, but because I want to. I want to build relationships with them and I want them to get excited about something. My passion has changed. My love for my students has changed. I love them in a far deeper way than I ever would have imagined possible 9 years ago, when I didn't even know Thailand was in my future. None of this has come about of my own doing, that's for sure.
• About a year and a half ago, one of my students (a proclaimed atheist) decided to prove that the God of the Bible couldn't exist. He watched videos 'debunking' God's existence, and brought questions to me in class that he thought were foolproof. This passion sparked the beginning of 18+ months of conversations between us, which have now expanded to include multiple other teachers and students at our school. I see the Spirit at work here, softening multiple hearts into a form where they are receptive to Truth. 
• This school year I have randomly been in contact with multiple former students, several of whom have started serious conversations similar to the ones mentioned above. 
• I have kept in close contact with a friend who moved away, but who was also deeply invested in the lives of many of the same students as me. Our conversations have been encouraging and life-giving for both of us, and have brought extra blessings as we get to share how we see the Spirit moving in the lives of people around us.

Our calling is not always what we want it to be. It is not always something we would have picked for ourselves. It is something that one person may say "Oh, I could never do that!" and another may say, "Wow, I wish that I could do something that cool for God!"

As common as those thoughts are, I believe we should not be saying these things. Especially not that last one. God prepares each of our hearts for the calling that he places on our lives. He doesn't ask us to compare ourselves to one another. He asks us to do the work that is placed before us. To bring God's shalom, hope, love, and joy to those around us, no matter the circumstances.

This, by the way, is how I've concluded that my calling is here, at GES, for the time being. I feel the Spirit whispering to me, "The work isn't finished yet. There is still more to do." There are still more places where I can bring God's shalom into someone's life. There are still times where I will be able to talk about peace and joy and hope in a way that will influence one of my students. There are still hearts that need to experience God's love through my person, somehow, somewhere.

And you know what? Despite the questions that this conclusion brings, despite the hardships that come with living overseas, there is such a deep level of peace that comes with the knowledge of living the life I'm called to live. And that peace brings joy. It brings love. It brings hope. And all of those things fill me up to where I can spread them around again to those I come in contact with.

What a beautiful thing it is to be called.